Welcome to Maid Spin, the personal website of iklone. I write about about otaku culture as well as history, philosophy and mythology.
My interests range from anime & programming to mediaevalism & navigation. Hopefully something on this site will interest you.
I'm a devotee of the late '90s / early '00s era of anime, as well as a steadfast lover of maids. My favourite anime is Mahoromatic. I also love the works of Tomino and old Gainax.
To contact me see my contact page.
Kelsie checked the store shelf once again. She was looking for something very specific and it didn't look like they had it in stock. She glanced over at the store manager to try and get his attention. No luck, he still seemed to be intensely interested with the floor and was ignoring her presence completely. Kelsie sighed internally. People ignoring her like this was almost an everyday occurrence; she knew they didn't mean any harm personally, but it still injured her self-esteem every time it happened. Such was the life of a slime monster in modern society, shunned as an outsider.
She turned back to the shelf of guitar picks that she'd been perusing before. Being a slime monster she required custom picks due to the biological differences between her and humans. But alas, it didn't seem like she was in any luck. They had picks for mermen and centaurs sure, but absolutely zilch for slime monsters. Oh well, she'd just have to deal with what she already had for now. She quickly checked her internal slime watch, a common slime monster trait, and realised that she'd spent much longer in this shop than planned. With a curt "thank you" to the store owner, who responded with a grunt more akin to a goblin than a human, she left the music store and headed left down the hill towards the house of her best friend Katie, and where she was scheduled for band practice in just under 10 minutes.
"I'll never make it in time", she muttered under her breath as she made way briskly down the pavement. Suddenly an idea came to her. Checking up and down the road for passers-by she skipped over to the drain cover across the street. With one last glance over her shoulder, and with a gelatinous sloshing sound, she disappeared through the grating down into the drain; now she was in business. When constructing their towns and cities, the humans had unwittingly placed in super-highways perfectly suited for slime monster transport. As she whisked down the sewage pipe she smiled at the small triumph her human superiors had accidentally handed her. Down in the drains was Kelsie's safe space. Away from the constant heckling in the streets above and into an environment only her body could handle. Taking a sharp left Kelsie zipped along, unimpeded by the various unspeakably disgusting objects littering the pipeway. She didn't mind though, this is how a slime monster like her should be living; with the grime of a subterranean abode. Next she took a right, then another left, and finally a 90 degree pivot upwards. She had reached her destination. With a satisfying glooping noise she appeared from the tap in Katie's bathroom. She took just a few seconds to reassemble herself properly and proceeded to slowly push open the bathroom door. Creeping down the hallway all was quiet, which meant band practice hadn't started yet, success! Just as she was reaching for the garage door it swung open, and the face of Katie appeared, paint adorning her cheeks.
"Kelsie!" she exclaimed, "you took the sewer route again didn't you? I told you not to do that, you know what the police'd do if they caught you... Oh well. Your bass's over by the amplifier so go get set up."
Kelsie nodded and, entered the suburban house's garage. The other two band members were setting up too. June was tuning her guitar against the back wall, her white feathered wings folded up neatly against her back. Danielle the spider girl was there too, spinning her 4 guitar sticks at the end of her arachnid arms. She smiled at Kelsie as she entered, the black paint on her face cracking slightly.
"Ayy it's Kelsie, hurry and kit up I wanna start playing."
"Aye aye." responded Kelsie, the excitement already building in her, "just let me tune my bass."
"No time!", yelled Katie from behind her, having already returned from the errand she'd been running, "we gotta start playing now, I've already set the timer!"
Five seconds was all it took for June to play the first chord, and five seconds was all Kelsie needed to throw the strap over her shoulder and ready her pick. And they were off. From the first ear-shattering chord played, Kelsie could tell they'd be going full force on this one. The noise emanating from her amp alone was enough to set car alarms off for miles around. She strummed hard. Real hard. The vibrations from the noise travelled all the way up her body, causing a rippling sensation up her invertebrate body. She was vaguely aware that Katie had started singing at some point, although singing was a generous description of the sound emanating from the teenager's mouth. More like a power drill than a human voice, her screams pierced over the low earthquake of Kelsie's bass. It didn't really matter what chords she played. It never did. As long as she didn't stop for a breath the cacophony could continue.
This was harder than they'd ever played before, much harder; a new record for the Black Eternal Suicide Death Brigade. Then the fire show started. Katie had linked up her kitchen's gas stove up to a pipe transporting the highly flammable gas into garden sprinklers set up in the garage. They were set to go off when Katie pushed a foot pedal and go off they did. Fire filled the room searing the hair off Kelsie's comrades with the immense heat. Far from deterring the foursome it merely made them more powerful, the noise level now rivalling a rocket launch, causing visible vibrations in the walls of the surrounding house. Not that the girls noticed, they had passed beyond mere mortal consciousness. This was their life now. The creation of greater and greater discord and to finally, finally deconstruct the cruel unfair world they had been born into. Pull down the society that surrounded them, treated them as outcasts, as lesser citizens. Destroy that which their enemies had worked so hard to create. This was their destiny. And collectively they could achieve the pure and total annihilation of all civilisation. Order to anarchy. Form to chaos. Kelsie suddenly became aware that she could no longer hear. Her eardrums had long since burst and her only sensation was a loud ringing noise along with the vibrating force of a Richter scale 9 earthquake of pure noise around her. Her vision was starting to fade also, but she didn't care. None of them did. They were only doing what had to be done. They weren't going to survive this. They had never expected to. This was their final stand and BY GOD they were going to achieve MAXIMUM ENERGY. Kelsie strummed harder than she had ever strummed before, her jelly fingers being ground down into the strings. Even the ringing had stopped now. The loudest silence ever recorded. The fire had piped down to a simmer, like a cobra ready to pounce. It was time. Katie turned to the members of the band and gave a shrewd, bloody smile. Kelsie nodded. With a stamp on the ignition pedal the entire garage was engulfed in a blast of plasmarised air. The heat instantly evaporated the performers, no the heroes. Although the heroes were gone, they had won. The legacy of that day turned out to be louder than even the event itself. Echoing across the globe, starting the fire that had been coming for so many years. The end of life as you all know it; the age of monsters had begun.
